Lithium

Stop all my fears cause I'm hopeless. I hate my girl but I love her that's a damn shame. I hate how she can do anything to me and I just let it go. But she act like we spose to be even cause I be fucking hoes. Nah... that ain't shit. And ever since 08 I made sure I've been protected ever since. Since then problems have arose. I see the people she's let touch her and the people that's tried to talk to her in my mind. Ontop of that I'm struggling. I'm being carried without balance so I'm hanging on to nothing. Everybodies going their seperate ways and I'm searching for my way to go. I try to make myself believe that this part of the game is part of the game. But I be feeling more lost than most. Kevins gf died and it still bothers me. I feel like I shoulda died and she shoulda lived. I'm worthless anyway. She had purpose. Maybe that's not even for me to say or talk about tho. Good morning for this long stressful day. At least this blog post made me feel a little better. Sigh