Let's go back. Let's tell the truth. I need a somewhere to go. According to my gf and the state of Texas that's jail and a protective order which has cps calling about my daughter. But that's life right? Nah. Just a dumb bitch I happened to fall in love with. 6 months? Wow. I know one thing if I go to jail its gonna be HELL when I get out. Just outta principal. I miss Pimp C. I miss Dj Screw. I miss banging dip set getting money smoking weed and passing bitches to my niggas. The internet got boys afraid to speak in person ha. What happened to everybody? I member hating the internet and never getting on it ha. Boy how things change. I wanna talk to God. You hear me God? How close am I to this ending? How much longer do I have to be a failure. I don't hate or have a grudge against Houston, but I understand this city is not the same. What was once fun and trill is now just a pulpit for pussy niggas to get rich off. Its so hard down here. Its a trap, literally. Word to my dad stressing repeating to me over and over that I GOT TWO KIDS. Ugh. Some bitch has a child with me that I don't love? Is this life? Am I ignorant? I was. Not no more though. Child Support made me full aware of that. Now its fuck Texas and these ho ass judges n lawyers. Why should I have to pay somebody. If you wanna kill me, kill me already. Cause I obviously don't. Care. My mom knows me best I'm still a child myself and a baby. But L'eau calls me dad. Dada' to be exact. That still amazes me. How proud and happy she is just to be around me. She saw veeology cover today and just screamed dada dada so happily and I smiled in the front seat whilst my gf looked poorly astonished. She doesn't support shit. Its cool tho, even tho I support her and protect her. But lemme not draw a fake image. She pays for everything. Happy? Even tho, whatever. Fuck these models man. Fuck these rappers. Fuck these problemless people. I hate them all. Fuck everybody, For they all are so phony. I had it right not wanting money, but I want money. More so need money. Funny world right? I'm prolly just gonna ramble off cause I'm bored and have to sleep in my car tonight I hate this shit. Its hot and bugs are out in Texas. Crazy. I'm in a hotel suite one night and starving in the car the next. Worth the grind tho right? Ha. I might commit suicide on my birthday. I really want to. My brother would be so upset tho. He's right about me making it I know ima make it but its hard with all this ridicule and no help I'm always the one wearing the bruised shoes and I'm tired of it. I been looking for a job. No luck yet tho. I just wanna have like a 2 week heroin binge, justa leave life and gain some courage. I'm sorry lord I'm trying. They even hung Jesus ona cross tho.
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