sooooooo i got some sleep tonight, wasn't very long, but hey, i still slept..only reason i'm blogging that is becus i haven't been sleeping much lately, & when i do sleep, it's not good sleep, it's like very bad sleep.. & i have to have a sleep process justa go to fucking sleep. Like i gotta first try to tire myself out cus i have all this fucking energy..then i gotta lay down..so i get more tired..then i gotta go eat something to distract thee feeling in stomach..after that, i gotta play thee ipod loud as fcuk till i doze off a little bit, then i put thee ipod up n fall asleep...crazy huh, but hey it gets thee job done lol.. been having sweats lately when laying in bed altely, i don't be hot or nothing my skin just be turning red n shit, n my whole body starts to sweat..wierd. Another wierd thing is, i've been dreaming lately, like every night there will be a dream, as of lately.. One of my dreams been about someone i've particualy been wanting x thinking about..tryna figure what i'ma do about that, i think i might just say fuck it n come straight up about it...to her. Some dreams just be plain wierd...& this dream i had tonight, was that i hadda daughter, but we had a bad connection becus of thee people she's been around n her mom was saying all sorts of bad stuff about me, but i was explaining tryna catch a connection with my daughter n i was telling her i've been gone cus i've been on thee road tryna become stable to take care of her..but she was mad at me.. More stuff happened, but damn.. don't even really wanna say. Cus you know i thought i hadda daughter at one point in time, with someone i actually wanted more with, but it wasn't meant to be i guess.. it's cool tho. I'm listening to "
pretty eyes" as of now while i write this thinking bout seperated things that might all pull together. I'm going to san fran, california at thee end of thee month to do this show out there..i'ma be out there for a couple days short than a week.. Gonna go meet people, give supergood to radios, network with some people i needa meet n so n so.. Happy cus i wanna see cali, so it'll be dope, prolly get some of that medicial herb, that super silver shh...yess i have to, it would only be right lol. I think my mom wants me to put me on sleep medication, or get me a therapist, she been asking me do i want meds lately, but i aint tryna get an addiction for meds, i needa learn how to sleep on my own.. Today she asked me, why am i not excited bout thee show n what i'm finna do down there, i said..I am excited, just gotta lot on mymind right now x i'm too sleepy to smile as of now..tomorrow i'll smile for ya! For sure..lol A part of me internally is excited cus what i'm doing now is making history for thee new generation, everybody likes to hear about an artist's struggles before they were on, i guess it makes people love them more as an artist being that they really wanted to be where they are, & they went through everything to get there.. With me, making it is more than just me getting some money, being known, blah blah blah.. If i make it, i'ma give alotta people inspiritation to be what they wanna be in life, be who they are, alotta people in houston can get ambition from me to not settle for less in life, really become more, cus i mean, we are thee future, so i'm tryna lock in mine.. N change thee mindset for yours.. It's niggas in houston who respect me as an artist already & that shit means alot to me, it's nice to know, real people are already on my side before i have all that bullshit fame where people just like you cus you "on", i respect thee real people who just generally like good music x see me as inspiration as i let yall enter my life n watch me as i make moves to get in this game n change this shit fully.. shits amazing to me, & i don't even feel pressure, to me making music, being myself is natural.. I don't "try" at all, i just do. N so should you
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