Bad news...

Seems like every relationship i've been in thee girl was ultimately decieving..

Been getting cheated on since i started dating.. 

So i'm thinking.. is there something wrong with me or are these girls just whores cus their young..

So when i got in about 8th transitioning to 9th grade, i decided to not be faithful to anybody i might date or not take them seriously for thee least.. 

I always dated pretty girls so i guess that dudes trying to speak is always gonna be a problem..Understandable

But thee thing that bothers me is that my girl [no mater who it was] at thee time would always try to seem so innocent, like..thats my friend. ON thee other hand, it'll be like why is a girl texting you, "yall fucking" Funny, it seems as if girls [ones i've been involved with at least] don't believe males n females can be friends...hmm...so what should i think about your so called "friend".  Strange 

I haven't been in many actual relationships..maybe like 6 or 7 throughout my life.. Prolly less than that, but fuck it. 

What complexes me is that i can tell when my specific girlfriend is doing something wrong.. N pretty much, i'm tired of tryna stop girls from cheating nor worry about being hurt by love.. I don't spazz out all thee time, but i don't act like everythings alright either.. I'm getting older, so i'm starting to look at relationships ina different way cus alotta more shit is gonna start mattering since i'm not a kid anymore.. but like.. right now, i don't know if i'm ina relationship or not..seems like it's an on-call or when were together type thing... Mainly cus i see different sides of a person when they're not around me.. It's funny how people can just change up one day after being under thee influence of "friends".. It's funny how dudes diss me n say i'm not a good dude, but why hate on me to accomplish what you tryna do.. Pause thee hate, & just do you, it's obvious she's interested since you got thee number..so leave me out of it. They achieve thee hardest part, but don't know how to come home with it.. That's life tho, for now.. Pretty soon, i'm not gonna be worried about "love". Pretty soon i'm not gonna be troubled by my past. Pretty soon i'm gonna be far far away..working hard to bless my mom n son.. Pretty soon i'ma be happy.. Thats all i really want outta life.. Is to be happy.. Everygirl i ever left wants me back.. I know i'ma good dude, made some mistakes, but fuck it, i'm not perfect, & i don't try nor act like i am..i'm just me, tired of girls playing games n being sneaky & lieng... I gotta stay true to myself. I live for a purpose. i found it, now i'm pursuing it.. 

I also noticed that alotta people in my city have no ambition for anything... They all just lames n boppers, not tryna proceed themselves in anything.. Thee dudes think living with they moms forever, buying unfly clothes, taking myspace pics, wearing each others clothes, & driving their moms cars n stuntin like it's theirs is cool.. & thee females chase these soul-less dudes, get pregnant to trap niggas, & smoke a bunch of weed n work at low-paying places n move in with like 4 different girls so they can pay rent.. Shits funny to me.  

But thats why i'm trying my best to get tha FUCK OUTTA HERE QUICKLY. My pops told me nothings here, but trouble.. He's right. It's depressing & i don't hang around these people cus i can't relate to them, they not on what i'm own.. I'm happy alone in my apt.. I'm working on my craft.. I'm tryna better myself.. My mom belives in me so that's all i need really.. I get what i need & i buy what i want. So.. Solo's good mayne. Finna get better tho